Baby and Zach Updates

I had my 33 week check up yesterday and things are looking good. She is still sitting breech (she has been that way for about 10 weeks or so). It is still a little early to start talking about what we want to do but in the next couple weeks we will talk about our options, like an external version (which I am scared to death of). I am just holding out hope that she will flip around here pretty soon! She has been very active lately and even kicking for daddy (she usually hides), she has even had the hiccups 3 times in the last week (I never felt them with Zach, so it was a little exciting).

Zach is doing good. I think he is missing school and the structure and stimulation he got there. He has been acting up a lot more than normal at daycare and at home. Not listening and saying "no" a lot, and almost swatting at us when he says no, as to say go away. I guess typical 3 year old stuff right? But not normal for him. He is usually the sweetest kid, with lots of hugs to give away. At daycare he has been pushing other kids, but it sounds like they push him too, so it is just not good all around. At first he was just pushing a girl that was younger than him and we were afraid that it was because we have been telling him that he will have a baby sister soon, and they tell him that at daycare too and sometimes used this little girl as an example (it is mostly boys there)... like "see, you will have a baby girl like her at home", but it seems he is doing it with his buddies too, so I am hopeful that it isn't the thought of a sister that is causing it. Some of the boys there have older brothers and I think they pick up bad habits that way too. Luckily Cindy has the same discipline style as us, so he gets timeouts there when he acts up.

Zach has recently discovered Hip Hop Harry and loves him. I personally would rather watch Barney but Zach asks for Harry by name and dances along with the kids. We have been DVR'ing episodes so he can get his fix. I hope he grows out of it fast.

We have been working on him wearing his glasses. He has had them for 4-5 weeks now and he still isn't crazy about the idea of them. When he was in school, he would wear them great for his teacher for a good 1 1/2 - 2 hours. (he only has to wear them 2-3 hours a day). Cindy usually gets him to wear them for about 1 hour a day, but they do so much outside play that it is hard to get too much time in. He is terrible for us when we try to put them on him.

We have a fun weekend coming up, so I will post more after that.

Here is a picture of Zach in his specs.

Water Fun!

We finally got Zach's cool little water pool/toy out that he got for his birthday last year (yes I know, bad mom) and he loved it. Him and daddy cooled off on Sunday in the freezing water. Zach loves to stand up and jump and land on his bottom. He did it so many times and he would say "watch this" with his cute little Zach accent.

Big Boy Bed!!

It has been almost 2 weeks that Zach has slept in his new bed every night and naptime. He is doing great. Even when he goes to bed and doesn't fall right to sleep, he just lays there and talks a little bit. He doesn't try to climb out, which I was sure he would! When we first got his bed, he wanted nothing to do with it when it came to sleeping. It was fun to climb on during the day, but at night, he wanted his crib. He has never tried to climb out of his crib and he would probably be content sleeping in there until he was 10, but with the baby coming, we needed to make the transition. We wanted to give him a good amount of time before she comes to be used to his bed and I couldn't be happier with how well he is doing!!

Great Article....

I especially love this line...

Do your part. Don't stare. Say hello. Be inclusive. And when you want to insult someone's intelligence, remember to use a different word.

http://blogs.usatoday.com/oped/2007/07/a-mothers-view-.html


A mother's view of a word that wounds: 'Retard'

By Theresa Howard

You are such a retard.

You've heard the expression. Sometimes it's preceded by an expletive, as in "you're such a f—-ing retard." Either way, with or without the curse word, it's a harsh statement. But one, it seems, that's become increasingly acceptable. So much so that in one recent week I kept track of how many times I heard it and who said it. I heard it daily — whether it was a colleague, a neighbor talking to his dog, an actor from a hit TV show during an interview with me, a top level advertising executive, young men playfully swapping insults or Tony Soprano to his son after a botched suicide attempt.

Last year, the r-word was in the title of a Two and a Half Men episode It's a word that, unlike "pimp" or the n-word, is always derogatory. For reasons that I can't understand, pimp has become synonymous with style. The n-word, for a handful of African-Americans, is a term of endearment — until someone outside the circle uses it. Then it becomes derogatory.
But no matter how or by whom the r-word is used, it's always in a negative context. You don't hear, "What a great idea, that's so retarded." You don't hear, "Awesome catch — what a retard move."

While some are advocating that the n-word be banished from America's lexicon, who is the voice for the 7.5 million Americans with intellectual disabilities who truly are mentally retarded? Who is defending their dignity while everyday folks — educated adults at that — take a term that clinically applies to the disabled and use it as an insult?

What's my fascination with the r-word? I take it very personally. And I'm not a person who is easily offended. I am, however, the mother of a 6-month-old daughter who was born with Down syndrome. Lydia Catherine is sweet. She's got a warm smile and very knowing blue eyes. She's got a subtle little dimple and a tiny tuft of strawberry blonde hair that swirls into one single swoop into the air.

When she looks at me, I feel like she can see all the fears, concerns, doubts and questions that swim around in my heart and my mind every day. Will she be smart enough to know when she hears people say the word "retard" that they are talking about her?

This is not new territory for me. I grew up the sibling of a Down syndrome sister. Catherine Anne was 41 when she passed away four years ago. She was born at a time when "mongolian idiot" was the operative term, and doctors suggested to my parents to leave her behind and she'd be taken care of. It really meant she would have been institutionalized. They didn't listen. Catherine lived with my parents until the day she died.

For as long as I can remember, I corrected people when they said the r-word. I flashed dirty looks to people who stared. I told parents to tell their child that it's not polite. Ever gregarious, Catherine would smile at strangers, many of whom would be so uncomfortable that they didn't know what to do. Even after Catherine passed away, I continued to correct people for a few years. Then I got tired. I no longer felt it was my battle.

Until Dec. 10, when Lydia was born. My journey has begun all over again, this time with me as the mother and my older daughter, Sofia, as the sibling. If I was protective of my sister, I am almost scared of how protective I will be for Lydia and her own sister. But as she grows up in a time when "retard" is a socially acceptable slur, professional organizations are trying to change the clinical term. Last November, the American Association on Mental Retardation changed its name to the American Association on Intellectual and Developmental Disabilities. The Special Olympics is advocating that "retarded" be dropped from the vernacular.

Fixing the terminology is only a start. The bigger issue is acceptance of people with disabilities.
Do your part. Don't stare. Say hello. Be inclusive. And when you want to insult someone's intelligence, remember to use a different word.

Theresa Howard is an advertising reporter for USA TODAY. She lives in Hoboken, N.J., with her husband, Peter Baracskai, and their two girls.